Wednesday, February 04, 2015

Everybody hurts, sometimes ...

“All sorrows can be borne if you put them in a story or tell a story about them”
I read that in this essay a few days ago.  I knew I would come back to that because it is such a powerful line.
A powerful idea.
A powerful way to approach the sorrows in life.

Today, I came back to it.  Because, a friend had posted on Facebook that today--February 4th--is World Cancer Day.

Now, think about the people you know who have cancer.
Had cancer.
Their sorrows.
The sorrows of their friends and families.
“All sorrows can be borne if you put them in a story or tell a story about them”
To tell a story, or to put them in a story does not have to have a literal meaning. It can mean something as simple as to merely talk about that sorrow.
There is no pressure to move on. There is no shame in intensity or duration. Sadness, regret, confusion, yearning and all the experiences of grief become part of the narrative of love ...
My life's simple sorrows have often become stories in their own ways in my writings here and elsewhere.  Sorrows that have completely jolted me have also become a part of my writings--though not always with explicit references to those sorrows.

Life is full of sufferings of many different sorts.

When a toddler falls while running, she cries. That story is told. Which is perhaps why the toddler ends up laughing a few minutes later. Sometimes even a few seconds after the crying.  We become adults and we forget that lesson. The lesson that:
“All sorrows can be borne if you put them in a story or tell a story about them”
A sorrow is a sorrow.

How big a sorrow it is depends on how we are able to put them in a story.  But, no sorrow is trivial.  All we can do is to hold on.  Because, everybody hurts sometimes.
Well, everybody hurts sometimes
Everybody cries
Everybody hurts sometimes
And everybody hurts sometimes
So hold on, hold on
Hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on, hold on


Anne in Salem said...

My sorrow story about cancer has a positive outcome. My sister-in-law was battling metastatic breast cancer and required weekly blood transfusions. She lost the battle, but my brother had her for a few months longer than he would have without the transfusions. I tell my story every time I give blood in hopes of delaying some else's sorrow.

I thought talking about sorrow was a female trait, much as talking about any emotion stereotypically is considered a female trait.

Sriram Khé said...

Ouch! That is a terrible sorrow. And what a neat way to remember and tell her story ...

I suppose we men write about sorrows in very indirect ways ... the trigger for the post was a friend's husband's cancer diagnosis ...

Ramesh said...

Everybody hurts sometimes, of course. Maybe even many times. And each of us have our own way of coping with it. It so so tough, whichever way.

But then the one consolation is that without sorrow, there is no joy. "Happiness forever" is actually a curse.

Life is strange.