Monday, September 02, 2019

I work double shift on Labor Day!

When we adults wake up, we begin to think about what to do that day.  As the poet-extraordinaire Kannadasan wrote in his astounding lyrics for this phenomenal songகாலை எழுந்தவுடன் நாளைய கேள்வி அது கையில் கிடைத்தபின்னும் துடிக்குது ஆவி  (Kaalai Ezhunthavudan Naalaiya Kaelvi | Athu Kaiyil Kidaitha Pinnum Thudikkuthu Aavi), which roughly translates to "After waking up, one ponders about the day | Even if one gets what one wants, the mind remains restless."

We have had to figure out what exactly we want to do with our lives, especially since humans got away from their hunting/gathering existence and invented agriculture. 

Not being able to figure out the day, when it happens day after day, makes one worry about the more fundamental, existential questions.  Perhaps that is all the more that we report to work, even if it is not the work that we love to do because the alternative sucks and even frightens us.

Even before getting into the engineering program, I worried that I wouldn't enjoy it.  Four years in the program certainly confirmed that.

Working in India upon graduation erased even the tiniest doubts I might have had.  I hated waking up in the morning and heading to work.  I barely survived ten weeks in my first job, and then it was a quite a few months before I took up my second one, in which I didn't even last a month.  After a couple more months of "unproductive" existence, which perhaps triggered quite a few heartburn episodes in my parents' lives, I took up another job in which I served the longest--six months!

And then it was off to the US for graduate schooling.

The "work" after graduate school was not one that I had planned on, and I certainly felt ill at ease there, while it certainly paid immensely more than what I currently earn.  But, I was no longer in my early twenties, and being older meant that I had to be more "responsible."  So, I faked my way through those nearly six years.

Lucky breaks I got.

I do not even pretend to my students, however, that they can always get to do whatever they want to do.  I warn them that "you can be whatever you want to be" is more often than not a lie.  A big fat lie. To those who engage me on this topic, I remind them that very, very rarely in life are we able to do whatever we truly enjoy doing, and that they ought to be mentally prepared to simply suck it up and get going.

"Too many of us expect our jobs to give meaning to our lives."  Exactly!
In truth, we can’t be anything we want, nor should we try, because dreams are imprecise, and wants are insatiable. It is far better to focus on what we can do, where we can help. Our duties are a surer guide in life — and we are happier for embracing them.
But, the key is to always keep that dream and passion alive within.


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