Friday, April 04, 2014

Remember me, but ah! forget my fate

Some days, it feels like everything is in sync. Life then is a beautiful sounding melody. Today was not that some day.

My problems and disappointments of the day will be trivial when compared with yours. It will not be a blip. But life is about living the day. And making the day full of life.  My day felt empty.

The biggest task was to make a custard. Not for me. But for my neighbor.  To celebrate living.

My heart wept when all that work, the effort that I put in, turned out to be for nothing. A recipe that I have worked with for years.  The custard that I have made a hundred times, and every time to perfection. The recipe-tweaker that I am, I have dared not to modify anything in the making of this custard. Today, there was no melody.  The musicians did not even bother to show up.

I went back to the store to get the ingredients for another attempt tomorrow. Perhaps the music will play.

At least I am around to hear the melodies and the cacophony.  A friend is leaving for her homeland today in order to participate in the farewell rituals for a friend who died young.  When I talked with my parents, I wondered how they would react to today being the birthday of their son-in-law, who too died young.

The human that I am, all those huge tragedies do not make me overlook the trivial disappointment with the custard.  How can I when the sweet, wonderful aroma of the custard continues to waft about my home!  How can something produce that mouth-watering aroma and yet be a disaster?

I turned to the telly for comfort. I checked in with the Classic Arts Showcase channel. It turned out the channel was featuring sad music pieces one after another. Melodious. Glorious. But, sad emotions. As if the cosmos does pay attention to me and my feelings!

Which is how I came to listen to, and watch, a performance of Dido's Lament.

Maybe tomorrow will be that some day when everything will be in sync.  And life will be a beautiful sounding melody, even if filled with sad emotions, as much as Dido's Lament is.

Dido's Lament

When I am laid, am laid in earth, May my wrongs create
No trouble, no trouble in thy breast;
Remember me, remember me, but ah! forget my fate.
Remember me, but ah! forget my fate.

Here is that aria, Dido's Lament, marvelously sung and acted by Malena Ernman:

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