It's what it is

There wasn't a man waiting for a haircut and all the three barber chairs were vacant.  If only the cosmos always worked in my favor.

It is a women-owned business that is an old style barbershop serving only men.  I would never have imagined such a business venture.  Perhaps because haircuts for most men are incredibly simpler than for women, and this way they don't have to deal with the complications of women's hair. 

(But then do African-American men go to this barbershop?  Do these white women know how to deal with an Afro?)

When I lived in California, the state passed a law against discrimination in pricing for haircuts, and it became illegal to charge different prices for men and women.  I thought it was ridiculous that my simple haircut for which they mostly used the buzzing trimmer would cost the same as laborious scissor-snipping for a woman's lengthy ringlets.  So, I moved to Oregon ;)

I walked over to the chair that one of the women pointed to. 

"How do you want your hair cut?"

"A trim all around."

"Do you want me to leave the hair on top or cut that too?"

"Yes, trim that too.  I don't ever try to use that for any comb over."

She laughed but only slightly.  I suppose she imagined a few customers and their efforts to hide their bald domes.

Years ago, when John McCain was running against George Bush in the Republican primaries, I wanted to write to his campaign staff that McCain could get even my vote if only he stopped combing hair over in that awful manner that he did.

That was the time I was beginning to see and feel the male pattern baldness developing on my head. 

A course that I taught had students in the same classroom and students at another off-campus site. The class was held at a television studio-classroom, and images and sounds from the studio were sent in real time to the off campus site, and the video and audio from there were beamed back as well.  The classroom had a camera turned towards the instructor (me) and another from behind me to capture the students. In the monitors in front of me, I could see the images from all the cameras.  And that is when I caught the image from the camera that was behind my back--it showed the back of my head with the (then) thinning hair where the scalp was beginning to shine through.

I knew then that I would face up to it rather than cover it up.  If people were so desperate to hide their baldness, to what extent would they go to cover up far more important things in life?

"It's what it is" I told her.

She nodded in agreement.

As she picked up the tools of her trade, she said after a few seconds "yes, it's what it is."

She repeated those words with such relish that I suspect she will use that line for a long time.

We humans are not always ready to embrace it's what it is.  We are not wired that way.  We almost always want something different from what it is.  The Buddha advised that such a want for things big or small means there will be suffering.  The path forward, to peace and happiness, is not to want but to humbly accept what is in the here and the now.

Though I intellectually and emotionally understand it, it is not easy for me to think about the big hair that I once had, and the full head of grey hair that I would like to have as an old man.  What does the Buddha know about hair anyway?  In all the images as an enlightened soul he is a completely bald man! 

While I fail to practice the Buddha's advice, at least I don't do a comb over!

My hairy self more than 30 years ago!