The bike-path grammarian

"There's one more behind us."

It was a loud warning that came from behind.  By now, we are used to all kinds of alerts from bicyclists, old and young.  Some ring a warning bell.  Some just zoom on by catching us by surprise.  A few days ago, an old woman's voice yelled out something like, "please step off the path because there is another bike coming towards me and I have no space."

We literally stepped off the path onto the wet gravelly ground.

She then slowly went past us on a cruiser bike.  Maybe there was no stopping or slowing once she got herself going!

This time, the voice warned us about multiple bikes.  A masked woman passed us, followed by another woman.

I looked behind and there was nobody else.  Why did she yell out "there's one more behind us"?

She should have instead yelled out "one more behind me."  Maybe she also "buys local."  Whom cares, right! ;)

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In my early years as a pontificating professor (another alliteration that is also tautological!) in California, it did not take me much time to understand that students in my classes needed to learn how to write at the college level.

I, therefore, did the smartest thing ever: I sought help from the English Department.

I went this route because as much as I emphasized the importance of writing, I was almost always at a loss when it came to explaining to students why something didn't quite feel correct.  There was one particular occasion when a student raised her hand in class and asked for the difference between "affect" and "effect" because I had crossed out her usage of "affect" and written there that she should have used "effect" instead.

I had no clue how to answer that question.  I was stumped.  I told the class that I merely had a feel for it after all the years of working with the language, and that they had to take it up with the writing folks.

From the English Department, Kim loaned me one of her teaching assistants for 30 minutes each week for about six weeks.  One of those was Rebecca.  Once, over lunch when planning for the week's discussion on writing, we talked about books.  To this day, I am pleasantly flummoxed by her response to my question on what book she was reading for fun.  I expected her to respond with an interesting work of fiction.  I certainly did not imagine that the book that she was reading for fun was all about grammar.  Yes, it was about grammar.

I suppose I can confidently state that the biker who yelled about "one more behind us" was not that Rebecca!

Of course, there is more to life than grammar, which is the point of departure for a sacred Hindu prayer.  The first verse is literally about life that is wasted on grammar:

Bhajagovindam bhajagovindam
Govindam bhaja muudhamate
Sampraapte sannihite kaale
Nahi nahi rakshati dukrijnkarane.          
Translation:
Worship Govinda, Worship Govinda,
Worship Govinda. Oh fool!
Rules of Grammar will not save you
At the time of your death.

Rules of grammar will not save me from death.  But, they provide order in the chaos that is called life.

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