Look around before you utter the "d" word

It was an odd combination of foggy haze in the distant hills with the scorching sun beating down on us.  I shudder to even think about the summer days in this part of the world!

We rested a while.  I sat by myself (so, what's new!) and reviewed the photos.

A long time ago, a friend advised me to click as much as possible when being a tourist because you might never go there again.  Like an obedient student, that is what I do when going to new places.  I end up sharing less than a fifth of those shots--though I don't know a damn thing about photography, I have my own criteria to filter the bad from the good and the excellent ones!

A couple of minutes later, the guide and the lad sidled up beside me.  "Photos look?" the guide asked.

I help up the camera for them and kept advancing though the images.  They seemed happy.  Of course, they had also been taking photos throughout; my guess is that they wanted to see themselves in my shots.

As I put that away, the guide asked, "where is madam?"

A question about wife and children is always to be expected in India.  It is a part of the conversations.

"No wife" I replied.  "Divorced."

It was clear he hadn't expected that response.  Perhaps because to him, too, divorce continues to be a dreaded "d" word in India.  It might even be acceptable to share everything related to the cancer one might be suffering from--it is no "c" word--but divorce is another thing all together.

My parents hadn't even updated their domestic help that I am divorced.  When she asked me why my wife hadn't joined me on the trip, my eyes shifted to my parents with a look of "what? you haven't told her this from a while ago?"  They stepped in with the Tamil word for divorce.  She didn't ask me anything after that.

I felt that it was my responsibility to put the guide at ease.  I showed him one of my favorite photos of my daughter--at her medical school graduation--which I have retained in the camera over the years.  "This is my daughter" I told him.

He nodded his head.  And seemed to think about the question he could ask me.  After some hesitation he asked, "daughter married?"  I said yes.

The guide was definitely thinking a lot more.  A minute or so later came the next question.  "So, daughter wedding before or after the divorce" and I answered that too.

"But, you not married?" he seemed incredulous.  It seemed like he would gladly find me a bride from his hometown.

I laughed.  We resumed the hike.