Thursday, May 26, 2022

I read. I write. Now you read!

I recently read a book that might perhaps appeal to a narrow subset of the reading population.  (BTW, have you ever wondered what percentage of the population reads books?)  Authored by an American who immigrated from India when she was 12 years old, the book could become work for those not familiar with India and the US.  You can see why I think it has a limited audience.

I was so taken by the book that even when I was a third into it, I wrote to the author, Sharmila Sen.  The facility that we now have in the contemporary world to send an email to a writer who is a stranger!

Of course, this is not the first time I have written to authors.  I am always impressed when they reply.  After all, nobody needs to engage with a total stranger.  But, authors big and small are no different from this small town blogger: Most of us are social animals.  We like to engage with fellow humans, and we want to engage with them.

Some do not reply.  Authors like Jill Lepore set the bar high; despite her responsibilities as a mother, a husband, a Harvard professor, and a prolific writer, she replied to my email.  The reply was near instantaneous.

Back in the days when I authored newspaper commentaries, I received emails in response to almost every op-ed.  A few were hateful, yes.  But, for the most part, people were decent even when disagreeing with me.  I always replied to them, except to the haters.  To me, there was no second thought about replying; the whole point in writing op-eds was to engage with the public on important issues, and I loved that engagement.

So, I wrote to this author appreciating her book even as I was working my way through it.  The lively correspondence revealed that an architect who helped them settle down after immigrating was a friend of a graduate school professor of mine.  A small world this is with far fewer degrees of separation than we imagine. 

Carrying the ball forward, I wrote to my professor.  His reply was lengthy with rich details about his friend, and he attached photographs too!  In the email, he wrote: "I miss him a lot even though our contacts via email and phone were limited and actual physical get together even less so."

Old friendships from middle and high school years, from college, are so deep and meaningful that years of drifting apart does not mean that we do not miss them.  Such friendships take on a lot more value when compared against the "friends" in Facebook and elsewhere.  I used to be on Facebook.  I was worried about the technology snooping into our lives and making money out of it.  Further, I couldn't relate to the artificial "friendship" there with "friends" commenting about every damn thing, even though I knew very little about them in the real world.  Almost all of them were not really anywhere close to being my "friend."  Studies confirm that most people have about five intimate friends.  In addition, we might have about 15 close friends, 50 general friends. and 150 acquaintances.

In an alternate universe, authors like Sharmila Sen and Jill Lepore would be my friends.  Sympaticos.  After I finished reading the book, I sent a long feedback email, which I concluded with: "Thanks again for your book that helped me relish the old days, relive the immigrant experiences, especially the unpleasant ones, all over, be angry again, and to enjoy the world in which we live."

So, hey, read good books.  You never know what you might get out of them! ;)

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